Being Real and Creating Authentic Connections

Be the real you, written by Julia McdaidWhat does being real mean to you?

To me it’s about authenticity, and that to me is about being true to who you really are, about learning to follow your heart, knowing what you prefer and following what that truly means to you and where that leaves you. It’s about being the real you, not the person that you think the world wants you to be, not what you perceive is how people think you should behave or what you think is the way you should do things. To me being real is leaving behind the should’s and have to’s, the ought to’s and that’s the way you have to do things, and it’s about being open and true and following what feels right for you

I think when people are very open and very vulnerable they can question whether or not that’s acceptable, to me that’s just what really opens people’s hearts and it’s the way to really reach people and connect at a deeper level.

Being open and being vulnerable is not a bad thing and it’s not something to hide, its something that shows who we are to the world and yes we feel very exposed, it can be a scary place to be , yet you get such a deep connection with people because you’re connecting on a different level. You’re connecting from a place of truth, from a place of who you really are, talking to their heart and that means you get a much deeper and more honest connection, a much more true connection and realistically a much more longer lasting connection.

When you connect with people heart to heart you can get a very true friendship in a very, very short space of time. I am fortunate to have experienced this and to be surrounded by a community of people who connect at this level. I can assure you it really is a lovely space to live in and it’s wonderful to have so many friends that you can connect to at a deep level.

Reaching out
To anybody who feels they have a message to share, and is feeling vulnerable and scared of sharing their heart with the world, if there are things you feel you need to say and which are naturally coming from your heart, I would urge you to say them, to share them. Whether you want to share them personally, on video or in writing, the medium doesn’t matter. But that depth of pulling deep down into who you really are and sharing your truth reaches people, and that touches your audience, it touches the people you are speaking to and will give you an immediate connection.

And whilst it can be very scary to open up and recognise your true ideas and even more so to share with anybody else it’s also very freeing and it helps you in your moving forward with wherever you are in your world, and in your life.

Whatever it is that might be blocking you or in the way, if you are honestly facing up to what that is, what’s blocking you and what you were doing, you may even realise now it wasn’t ideal. When you acknowledge that to yourself from the heart and even more so when you can share that with others, not only are you freeing yourself, you are also helping the people you are speaking to so it has many, many benefits

You’re creating a deep connection with those you share with. You’re freeing yourself from whatever was blocking you, and also others like you. By living in a much more open space, by getting connected to that space in your heart you can share freely and be open, so I would say go for it.

Following your truth
You do your best to connect to your heart deep down inside and just follow your truth, for being your authentic self is all any of us can really do in this world. But it’s so easy to get distracted because our ego and our beliefs and everything we grew up with, all of our culture around us is pulling us in another direction, and we do sometimes feel like we’re going against the grain, but I really truly feel that the world wants real now.

The world is moving towards real so if you can be real you’re in the right space, you will connect with people from the right space, connect with the right people and you will be guided from your own intuition in your heart as to the right path to take.

So whenever you’re making decisions all you have to do really is check in, come back to this space of vulnerability and truth and ask yourself whether this is what you would love now.

And you will know somehow, whatever works for you, whether you have a feeling, or a word or a vision or whatever way your body speaks to you. You will find an answer. And it doesn’t matter what the world/society says, it doesn’t matter what you think other people will feel, or how they will see you because you never know how anyone else feels anyway so we might as well just be sure of ourselves

And you will find that other people who are true to themselves will be drawn to you, and you will have like-minded people around you to support you and you will end up having a lovely community of people who think a lot like you do. There is nothing better in this world than to have the right kind of beautiful people around you. And from that space you can go anywhere, I truly believe that and I look forward to seeing you in a beautiful heart space.

Let YOU Shine Through

Let the real you shineThis phrase has become my new tagline, because I think it really embraces what Authentic Edge is all about.

I want to support you in transforming the way you engage with life, so that you are showing up as the real you and you are as committed to yourself and your business as you would be to someone you were about to marry.

When you have a feminine structure in your life and know exactly who you are, the real YOU can shine through. And life flows then, things feel easier, you will certainly be (even) happier and you will feel in love with life.

It’s very easy in our world to get sidetracked and distracted from what we want and love to do. To slip out of being who we are and get caught in the day to day stuff that comes up. How often do you find your mood or behaviour influenced by the news, the media or others around you?

Do you feel under pressure to conform, to fit in? I appreciate there is a level of expectation in our society. Does this get you down?

At the end of the day all those expectations are outside of you, they represent other people’s views and thoughts. And I’m sure you already know the only person you can change is you. The only influence you really have is on yourself and how you decide to respond and show up.

I invite you to take some quiet time, take a break from the hustle and bustle and noise, and just allow who you are and what you want to surface. Ask yourself questions if it helps. Sit and reflect on how you want your life to be and who you are, really, deep down.

And if it isn’t who you are bringing to the world at the moment, how might you change this? What could you do differently?

Do you know when you are the real you in the world you will automatically attract the right people around you? By being true to yourself those who resonate with you will be naturally attracted to you.

And what I have found is that people who are being true to themselves, who are coming from their heart rather than their head, they do shine. They radiate love and beautiful energy.

I am pleased to know a lot of people who spend a lot of time in this place and being in their company is both energising and a delight.

Is the real YOU shining through? I don’t care if you don’t conform. I don’t care if you’re quirky. That’s real . Real is tangible. And in my view it’s the way the world is moving.

This blog was inspired by my superstar client Shannon Eastman, when we were discussing her website, and it was just really obvious to me that instead of trying to change her out of date business website, she replace it with her personal one www.shannoneastman.com. This site really shows her as a person as well as a marketer and business woman, and was actually just what she needed.

I’d love to hear about your own experiences, please add a comment or email me.

What does it mean to be authentic in business?

Have you ever stopped to think about it? Are you authentic? Do you have a meaning for that?

Greet authentically, be you

To me authenticity is about being real, it’s about being who you really are. And that doesn’t mean “my way or the highway, take it or leave it”, that sort of attitude will no doubt drive readers and customers away.
Being real is being honest and genuine, not putting on a front, because it looks good, or because that is the way you think you have to be or look in business, or in the field you operate in.

Do you ever find this at networking events, have you met the people who plaster on a fake smile, are all charm and high energy, yet it doesn’t feel genuine, have you seen them when they go outside and their whole demeanour changes? the armour comes down. I have, I know people who do that, what they don’t get is that on some level we all detect a fake, we detect when someone is not being genuine.

What do I have to do to be authentic?

Just be who you are. Really, it’s that simple. Though I would add that if you know you are in a bad mood or in your stuff, if you are having one of those days when things re getting to you and you know you have a lot of negative emotions, that is not who you really are.
To me who you really are is the you you are deep down inside, the person that comes from the heart and wants to connect with others.
I do appreciate that we are all both sides of the coin, and the bad days are as much a par t of us as the good days. All I’m wanting to highlight here is that when we have those days that is when we tend to lose sight of the authentic person, the person who lives for and from our heart.

So what are the benefits?

At the end of the day people buy people, you’ve heard that one before I know. And it’s true. So if you are who you are, when people like you they will be happy to do business with you. If you are pretending then you may find when you start working with someone the real you slips out and then they don’t like it and so problems rise, and you won’t have a good working relationship.

What about online?

These days a large part of our business presence is online, so we might also consider how we can be authentic in our dealings on the web. In many ways the behaviours are the same. What might you do? Just as an example, if you like something acknowledge it, tell the person you like it, compliment them, any genuine comments will be well received. If you don’t like it don’t share it, that doesn’t mean you have to be rude and announce you don’t like it. Do you see the line, its a subtle difference.

Equally when you recommend people don’t do it if you don’t know them or have nothing good to say, don’t make it up. One simple positive sentence that reflects your true experience and the benefits you received is far more value to a business than made up blurb written because you feel you “should” (or just for money).
You don’t have to live up to other people’s expectations, do what is right for you. And be the same person you are offline, don’t have an online personality and an offline one.

One thing I think is very true, it is so much easier and less of an energy drain to just be real and not be keeping up pretences all the time.

Be courteous and polite, follow sensible etiquette on and offline, there is no need to be rude or abrasive ever, and it wouldn’t do your reputation any good. Within these guideline be as genuine and honest as you can, respond from your heart, do what is true for you, and you will find people honour and respect that.

What if I’m not feeling it?

What if you feel you are not connected to the real you? if you feel you are too caught up in “life” and all the stuff it throws at you. Well I would suggest you just take some time out, it may only need a few minutes or an hour, just allow yourself to let go and slow down. Take a walk in nature, breathe deeply into your heart, write a journal , do some exercise, or meditate. Then choose to be more aware of what you are experiencing in your view of life, when you feel disconnected just bring yourself back.

It’s also good to really get connected to what life is about for you and what your business is about for you, beyond putting bread on the table. We all have a bigger reason for doing what we do. If you are unsure there are a number of ways you can connect more easily to why you do what you do. Use outside support if you need to.

It’s really not about having the most expensive car or computer or the fanciest business cards, they don’t get you business. These days our world is moving more and more towards appreciating and demanding authenticity, being who you are; and connecting to people in a genuine way is going to take you far.

What do you think? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this.

If you are uncertain about your big vision or why you are doing what you do, try our VIP Vision Day, its perfect for getting more clarity!