Time To Stop This Craziness

Sometimes, when its all getting too much, you just have to STOP!Are you enjoying the summer? Its school holidays now and for many an excuse to rest a bit more and work a bit less.

Not for everyone though, to some the nice weather just makes them feel guilty because they want to be out in it but feel under pressure to get on with other things.

 

Time for me
At this time of year the first thing I do once I’m up is take the dog to the beach, and we stay there for between one and two hours. I don’t check the time, we come back when we’re ready. That’s me time. I mostly don’t book appointments too early in the morning, and I only ever check the time on the rare occasion I do have a commitment.

Yet among the entrepreneurs I know, not many do things like this.

Too many folks are too “busy”

All too often I see people running around way too much, if you talk to them they keep on about how busy they are and don’t have time for things. Yet they are still keep adding more to the diary. And at the same time they are constantly making excuses for not doing things.

Typically these people are not hermits, 9 times out of 10 they’re at all the social events you can imagine as well, and all the business events and conferences.

Take a break

You don’t have to go to every social event, catch up with every friend and acquaintance every time. You don’t have to do it all

You do need to take a break, give yourself day off, quietly, on your own, or an evening off. On your own, not with the pressure of social and fitting in with others

Or you might be forced into it
If you don’t rest your body is eventually going to make you, and you very likely won’t like the way it does it!
Here’s the thing, if you’re feeling stressed, for whatever reason, you need time out. You’re already making excuses for the things you don’t deem to be a priority, yet what is left is still too much.

And its not just you
Plus the people you are turning down are seeing you doing the other things and out and about all the time, and they are noticing, if they are switched on they are noticing that you’re not making them priority. Particularly if you post your every move on social media!
Your clients can see it, your friends can see it

So not only are you slowly making yourself ill, you are also unconsciously upsetting people around you or undermining their faith in you.

Too much inspiration?
And then there’s the other side, the entrepreneurs blessing and nightmare. You just keep getting more ideas. You do, don’t you? It’s normal.

What’s not normal is trying to implement every idea as soon as it comes to you. Where did you suddenly get time and energy? Either you put off something else, because this is exciting and in the now, or you’re trying to do it all, which means you’ve added even more to the “to do” pile!


Actions you can take

If you already promised to do something, don’t just say you can’t do it now, or you don’t have time, ask someone else to take over. Or delegate if you have someone you can hand over to.

If you get all these ideas and you want to do them all, write them down, keep an ideas book with you, and then do one at a time

If your feeling stressed, stop. Take time out. Really the world won’t end if you have a breather, nobody will die if it’s not all done today, honestly.

Be responsible
At the end of the day you have to take responsibility for what’s going on in your life. You can change things and you can make choices. Step back, breathe, and ask yourself what is the right next step for you. And do that.

If you feel that your life is a bit crazy and you’re looking for more balance why not check out my new workshop? How to Get Back to Balance: Know What You Want, Create More Time, And Get Back in Control of Your Life and Your Business read more here

First published by Authentic Edge, August 2015 © Julia Mcdaid

Its All In The Choices You Make

You know the answers, really you doI wanted to write about choices today. Mainly because I have been reflecting on this following a couple of recent conversations.

I’m sure you have heard & read about life being a result of the choices you make? And whilst that may sometimes seem harsh, or difficult to fathom, in realty if you look at smaller things you can see how your choices impact you

For example, today I am feeling tired. Yet it is entirely self-inflicted. I had a late night and got up early! I didn’t get enough sleep, end of story. End result is tired, need more sleep. I could have gone to bed earlier or got up later, I had a choice.

Take it back one step, well actually easier said than done. Where I am its hot in summer and I have a dog, so I need to be up and out and walked by about 9am. OK I don’t have to, but it’s more comfortable for both of us if it happens.

Plus last night I was hosting an event, I could have left much earlier and gone home. Fact is, I was the host, it’s my group, I don’t like to leave until it’s down to the last few people, and I was having a lot of fun! Was I worried about getting up in the morning? At the time, of course not.

Where am I going with this?

Well, here’s the thing. I could have slept in, I didn’t because of the dog, I chose to have dog, I chose to live here , I chose to walk when it’s comfortable, I chose to get up even though I felt tired..

I chose to run a social group, I chose to have the event, and I chose to stay til the end. I didn’t have to do any of those things.
Do you see? Lots of choices but my feeling tired today is nothing to do with anyone else, the Universe, the weather or whatever.

These things are cumulative and build up over time, lifestyle is affected by the choices you make. Whilst you may not see the path or the many choices you made over time, in the end you did choose the things that led you to where you are, whatever that may be.

And you can now choose how you deal with it, how you feel about it, and what you do about it

If you do nothing you’re still choosing, even though you may choosing to let others decide by not actively deciding something yourself.
I guess there are two things to take away from this.

One, to be aware of your choices as far as you can, even though you may not be able to see the future cumulative effect

And two, to take responsibility, by acknowledging that yes you did make choices that led you here, even if you didn’t realise at the time

What do you think?

Time Out Ladies, please… !

Take a break from work to rechargeAs I sit down to write this I am thinking about the ladies I have spoken with recently and what is going on in their lives and business.

I am finding that the ladies I am working with are invariably going through some kind of change in their business, and usually that means growth. It may be re-launching, restructuring, setting up a second business or taking the plunge and leaving employment to take a part time business full time. All different circumstances yet with similar patterns running through them.

And away from the business focus and the growth one of the keys things I find I am flagging up is the need for some “me” time.

It’s all too easy isn’t it when you have lots to do and get all excited about the new project, and have ideas buzzing around your head. You get caught up in the flow, which is great, you get productive, you make things happen.

Unfortunately you often forget about yourself. As a woman you are great at looking after others, and you typically put them first. And I find this can extend to the business too, its your baby after all.

Is this you? Are you really busy doing stuff, having fun yet slowly wearing yourself down?

Or are you taking regular time out, down time away from the business? Because we all need it for many reasons. Not just for a change of scene, it’s great to recharge your batteries, step back and look at things from a different perspective. Often when you are doing something else a fantastic idea will pop into your head, because you have allowed some space for it by switching off for a bit.

And it’s good to physically be in a different space too, whether you prefer to walk in the park or work out at the gym, exercise helps to keep your energy up and keep on top of things, And getting some fresh air helps clear your head and allows for clearer thinking as you will be more alert.

On a practical level giving yourself a break can help with your concentration, and if you are office based and looking at a computer a lot you will be doing your body a favour by taking some exercise, changing position and giving your eyes a rest!

There are all sorts of things you can do to shift your energy and focus on you for a bit, and what you choose will depend on you. You may exercise or meditate, go for a walk, or have a massage or get your hair done. There are no hard and fast rules, and there is no right way.

All I would say is remember you, look after number one so that you have the energy and focus to build and run your business without too much stress or exhaustion. And you will ultimately feel better and think more clearly too.

If you are feeling overwhelmed and would like some support in keeping you on track why not schedule a call with Julia?

What Are You Waiting For?

Waiting .. it never happens
I find it fascinating how much of our lives we can spend waiting. Waiting for things to happen, waiting for things to arrive, waiting for someone else to show up or do something.

I think it’s almost part of our culture “I’ll do it when…” and often what happens is you just don’t; do it, because you have put conditions on your result and those conditions might never be fulfilled.

How much time do we lose

How much of our lives do we waste because we don’t embrace who we really are and what we would really love to do? Do you delay going to that place in the world you have always wanted to go because you want to wait until your friends can join you, or because its romantic and you want to go when your ideal partner shows up?

Do you stay in a job you don’t enjoy because you are waiting for something better to come along? Or maybe you have your own business but you don’t grow because you are waiting for the right time, person or opportunity.

“Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.” – Napoleon Hill

Waiting begets waiting

Your subconscious mind isn’t that clever, it takes things at face value without interpreting them. So if it is hearing that you are waiting, it will give you more waiting. So that thing you are waiting for will just never happen.

Its only when you decide you won’t wait any more and start taking action that things start to change. I mean, what is stopping you? really. If things don’t work out quite how you had hoped, the world isn’t going to end. Honestly, it won’t.

Waiting is putting the power of your life outside of you. It’s being dependent on things you can’t control.
As soon as you choose to embrace who you are and what you would really love to do, whether in your business or life generally, things will happen. The very act of making a decision sets things in motion, both physically and energetically.

Things will change

And I guarantee you will feel better. Have you not been in a situation where things have been getting you down and you decide enough is enough, and so you do something, you take action, and you feel as if a weight has been taken off your shoulders? I’m sure you have, we’ve all experienced it.

So take a look at the things you want to do, the things you are going to do “when…” and see which of them are a part of who you really are. And those that are really you, commit to them and make a choice to go for it, to move things forward (even just a tiny bit) and watch things change.

You can start small, take baby steps. But take steps, so whatever you can now, after all…. What are you waiting for? 😉

Listening To Your Ideas

Listen to Your IdeasDo you get random ideas when you are in the shower, or driving, or just waking up in the morning? You know the ones, the things you never remember later.

What do you do with them? Do you pay attention or dismiss them, or just allow new thoughts to drift in and replace them?

I would urge you to pay attention. I know its not always easy to capture ideas in the moment, but if you give it more attention it will grow and you’ll have more chance of remembering it.

Why? Well I believe that we have ideas for a reason. They are a part of who you are. Little messages from your creative self. And if you want the real you to shine through then these may well be your clues.

Huge life changes can come about from the smallest of ideas. I am living proof of that. I moved country from what started as a random thought. It could have stayed that way, a throw away comment that amounted to nothing.

I guess in my case it may have triggered something that meant a lot to me, I’m not sure, but I drifted back to it and started focussing on it and thinking “why wait?” I realised that the random idea (moving to the sun) had been on the radar for some time, I had just always thought it was something I would do in the future when certain things fell into place.

Yet as soon as I gave it attention it was like a seed that had germinated and it grew fast. Because it was true.

So my point is that often things that are really important to us and that are representative of the real person inside, often may appear to be just a random idea.

We have thoughts for a reason, we have ideas for a reason. My invitation to you is to choose not to dismiss your ideas. At least take a look at them, and capture them in a book if they interest or energise you, even if you don’t think you can do anything about them at the moment. Though even then I suspect you will be surprised what you can do, if you decide to go for it.

But more than that allow them to flourish, see what comes up when you explore them, get curious. You never know where you may end up.

At the end of the day life is about choices. We always have a choice. And choosing to listen to those random ideas might just change your life.

Seasonal Obligations….. Are You True to Your Heart at Christmas?

As we approach the holiday season I think we are at a time when many feel under obligation for various reasons.

Authentic Edge at Christmas - thoughtsTo start with there is the expectation of spending the time with family. Many do this not because they want to but because they feel the obligations, it’s what’s expected, what they “should” do. So inevitably you don’t enjoy yourself because you constantly feel you are fitting in and you’re wishing you could be doing what you want to do.

So why don’t you? At the end of the day we all make choices in our lives which impact what happens. If you want to go skiing at Christmas or have a quiet day at home, or just spend it with your partner, why not do that? Stop and think about what you’d really love to do. You have a couple of days off work, it’s your time, how would you love to spend it?

(and yes I know there are people who have elderly or sick family and want to be with them, I appreciate that)

Obligation to Give

And then there are presents. Firstly feeling obliged to buy for certain people, or to spend a certain amount of money. We are all under this kind of pressure, though really when you stop and look at it we are putting this on ourselves with our own beliefs and thoughts about whether we will be judged.
So again stop and look at it, would you love to buy that person a gift? If so great, if not don’t, or buy a small token.

Obligation to Keep

And what about the gifts you are given? Here’s a biggie!
Do you feel obliged to keep them , even if you don’t like them? Do you feel you have to put them on display when the donor comes to visit? Well guess what, when someone gives you a gift it becomes yours, as such is your to do with as you choose, and if you choose to donate it to the charity shop that is entirely your choice. Do it without guilt. I was surprised earlier this year when my own mother even shared that she believes this, I was impressed though I hadn’t expected it of her.

YOU decide

So give it some thought, you are free to make your own choices, it’s your life, it’s your money, you decide how you spend your time and money.

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And if you know a woman in business, why not gift them a free Authentic Business Strategy Session? Or treat yourself! You deserve something for you after all 🙂

Put your inner pedant away and let your heart out to play

Back in September I put a tweet out about it being the end of the summer break and the beginning of the school term and asking how people felt about it.

Why do we criticise others so much?

Perhaps not unsurprisingly some people were picking holes and saying things like “my kids don’t go back to school today”, or “Tim doesn’t start until such and such”.

Actually I really don’t care what day your kids go back to school! The essence of the tweet was asking how people felt about the end of the summer break and getting back into the autumn and the long run in to winter.

It’s interesting how we have this almost natural need to criticise and pick holes in everything, and although I call it a “natural” need it is in fact based on a need of our ego. It is something that a lot of us have, most of us probably, and it comes from way back when our childhood, our culture and everything that created the need to have right and wrong in us, came about.

When we judge or criticize another person, it says nothing about that person; it merely says something about our own need to be critical.

Why do we need to judge? Why do we need to make people right or wrong? I believe our need to criticise happens only because we’re hanging out in our ego. So to me feeling the need to criticise something is a warning sign, a warning sign that I’m moving into my ego (ie my head, overthinking etc). If I am in my ego then I’ve moved away from my heart.

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving.
Dale Carnegie

So perhaps it’s worth considering next time you feel the need to criticise or judge somebody that actually that’s a warning to you that you’re not playing out from your heart, and that you’re coming from your head, from your ego space and maybe it’s time to reflect and revisit and just breathe and pull yourself back to a better space before moving on.

Because as we know criticism never serves anybody and it just puts us into a negative space as well as potentially causing damage, so if we just stop and breathe and hesitate before responding we can actually choose to put ourselves back into our heart space and be a lot more loving to the world and just generally make the world a better place to be in.

Would you agree?