Live your life for you

Live your life for you - Julia McdaidI have been reminded several times over the last month or so of the importance of living life to the full. Several people in my circles have either lost someone or discovered illness unexpectedly.

Unfortunately it is at times like this that most of us feel reminded to get on with life and do the things we always wanted to do, be with the people we want to be with and get out and make the most of things
Yet really they should always be our priority, why would you not make the most of your life? Why waste time with people you don’t like being around or who don’t inspire you, or doing things that you don’t enjoy?

And even worse if you find yourself in circumstances not of your choosing why keep the pain and hurt inside?
Yet it happens so often.

The natural response when circumstances around us become painful or uncomfortable is to shut down, often we are either conditioned not to show feelings and emotions or we are scared to or we feel uncomfortable letting it all out.

So what happens? It gets bottled up inside. We take refuge in keeping busy, using other activities to distract us. Some people become health freaks, always exercising, others become workaholics, all in an attempt to keep busy to keep the pain and hurt at bay.

And to what result? Usually this bottled up pain, hurt or resentment finds a way out somehow. And all too often it is through illness.

So then you have to stop, your body has forced you to. Those who are wise, or aware, listen and rest and look at how they came to be here.

Those who are not, or don’t want to face it may still carry on, trying to push through.

I have known people who always bottle up feelings and emotions and who always put a brave face on things, never showing how they really feel. And usually they are angry, there is bitterness underneath. And it is fake too, I have noticed how it feels fake when someone is always pretending, and I’m sure you have too.

I know it can require vulnerability to share pain or hurt, and many find this too hard. Yet being vulnerable is such an amazing strength. Sometimes we just need to change our perception to feel more comfortable.

So I guess my call to you today is to focus on what is important to you. And if necessary take steps to move things you don’t like out of your life, or at least away from you on a day to day basis. Whatever you can do to take your attention away from the things that get you down, annoy you, worry you etc has to be a good thing.

And also look at being more open, ask for help if you need it. Share how you feel, especially when something is getting to you. Be honest with yourself even if you don’t feel up to telling others.

I know I was brought up in a family that kept feelings and emotions hidden. I didn’t have role models who talked things out, it was all British “stiff upper lip” way of coping!

I have learned myself as life has gone by and I have grown as a person. And I feel very lucky to have been exposed to the people and situations that helped me become more aware and change into a much more open person. I know who I am now is a million miles away from who I was 30 years ago.

And one of the main things that has changed is that I do choose to do things for me, I generally don’t care what other people think, and I don’t let stuff get to me. It doesn’t mean nothing ever annoys me, or gets to me, of course it does. I just decide not to hang out there for too long.

Life is too short, and the most important person in your life is YOU.


  1. I loved reading this today Julia. I spent a long time simply managing my life and hiding my vulnerabilities. Now I know that it was through my weakness that I found my strength and I live my life so differently. And like you one I have stopped worrying about what others think. My happiness is no longer dependant on their approval.
    Have a wonderful week!

  2. This is so true and I just wrote something similar to this last week so it has to be conformation. We need to realized that life is to short and we need to be happy and with the person that makes us happy. I enjoyed this blog and may you have a great day. Come over and like my web and comment on my blogs let’s stay connected.

  3. Yes! I’m always so happy to see folks whose business is *not* nutrition and healthy aging write and speak about the impact of our choices on our bodies. It’s so true that your body will *talk to you* (through symptoms and illness) when you are not living in alignment with what is best for you. (And without our health, we don’t have much, and we cannot do much.) Love it! Thank-you.

  4. Julia, this post has so many nuggets of truth, thank you! When I was younger I had a hard time expressing my feelings, never wanting to “Rock the Boat”. Through years of working on myself, I now value me, my health and my happiness too much to hold feeling inside.

  5. It’s a wonderful thing when you learn to put yourself first and to take care of yourself!!

  6. Hi Julia,
    It’s so easy to be caught up in the daily tasks, and not pay attention to ourselves. I find that enjoying and living in the small moments within my busy life helps me “find myself” I definitely takes practice though, doesn’t it?

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